Mystery on Haight Street

The following is a bizarre bit of city life not for the faint of heart. It dates to this past spring, while I was still living in Upper Haight:

I was walking to Haight (at my usual double-time) and unconsciously stepped over something (like a seasoned San Fransican). Out of the corner of my eye, I noted that it wasn't the usual pee stain, turd or bar puke. Indeed, it was about a two foot long strip of ambiguous brown goo, and right next to it was a dead baby bird. I've passed this apparition a few more times in the course of the last couple days, and a certain morbid curiosity has gnawed at the back of my mind. What could have possibly made such a singular assemblage? Perhaps Sherlock Holmes has finally gone to my head.

In any case, when passing it this evening something clicked and I think I finally have an explanation for it. I'd assumed the strip to be diarrhea and couldn't place the bird into any kind of narrative and certainly I couldn't think of a plausible way that diarrhea could be laid out so evenly and in such a straight line. The bird did suggest one of the crusties' dogs was somehow involved, though.The bird was at the age that it probably had fallen out of the nest while testing its wings. My epiphany was that the goo wasn't diarrhea-- it was vomit!

One of the crusties' dogs must have swallowed the marooned baby bird whole in its eagerness. Then, the bird, whether through struggling or just because it was pointy and feathery, caused the dog to vomit. But not just any vomit-- projectile vomit. The unusually dark color and smooth consistency of the vomit can be explained by an atypical, homeless-person's-dog diet. I'm not sure what would cause this though, maybe pure meat? Or kale, perhaps?

Touring San Francisco: Some Recommendations

I love to show people around my city, but I can't always be there to do it. In one such case, I wrote up a quick list of recommendations of things to do and places to go in SF. I hope this will be useful for readers coming to The Dilettante via the googles, but for people who know me please don't use this as an excuse not to avail yourselves of my tour-guiding skillz. Without further ado:

-Burma Superstar on Clement St has great food. They'll have a long wait but you can give them your cell number and tool around the neat Clement St neighborhood while you wait. Make sure somebody orders the tea leaf salad.

-Mission Chinese (at Mission and 18th st) is some of the best asian fusion in the city. Go very early in the evening to avoid too long of a wait and definitely order the Ma Po Tofu.

-Make sure to get a burrito at some point. El Farolito is the "classic" one, but a lot of taquerias around Mission St are better, including Taqueria Cancun (mission and 19th) and Taqueria Vallarta (Balmy and 24th st near mission).

-Make sure to visit Chinatown (it's way bigger than the one in Montreal), and go during the day because a lot of it closes early. The main street is Grant, but you should also swing up to Stockton to see all of the markets. Chinatown turns into little Italy at Grant and Broadway which is pretty cute.

-If you happen to be in SF on a sunny weekend day, hang out at Dolores Park and people watch and maybe get an ice cream at the nearby Bi-Rite (its worth waiting in line for). The park is between the Mission (the hipster-type neighborhood) and the Castro (the gay epicenter of N America).

-Get coffee at either Sightglass, FourBarrel (first two have cool ambiance-- they roast the beans in the back), Ritual or Blue Bottle. You have never had coffee like this.

-Hike to the top of one of SF's scenic hills. Bernal Heights is good and it's near the Mission, Corona Heights is great and above the Castro, and Telegraph Hill is above little Italy. Telegraph doesn't have as broad a view of the city, but it is very pretty and still has great views.

-If you have some time, hiking around Lands End park (great view of the GG bridge) to the Sutro baths (crazy ruins) and ending at the Cliffhouse for a drink is a rad afternoon.

-There are plenty of museums if you're interested. The de Young is our big art museum and it's in the lovely Golden Gate Park.

-Cafe Flore in the Castro is a good place to get brunch at and people-watch. Thorough Bread bakery is a cheaper (less scenic but extremely delicious) way to brunch in the same area.

Playlists: Sarah 3

I don't remember exactly when I made this, the third playlist for Sarah, but it was somewhere in the middle of things, while we were living in Excelsior. The music is also perhaps the most rounded, rocking, and generally conducive to a good time and it's the one I've most frequently used to provide people with an introduction to my musical taste, partly because the lyrical content is less explicitly romantic.

Of course, elements still recall that relationship, with the immortal song title "What Do You Want Me To Say?" (Mad Men, anyone?) and the gentle sincerity of "Balancing Act" and "He's My Star". "Nod Scene" and "Rebel Girl" were both homages to the sense of "fuck you" hipsterism that Sarah can evoke and the sense of cool that the two of us constructed together.

Sarah particularly enjoyed the tempered idealism of the original Mommyheads track that unfortunately had to be substituted on the Grooveshark listing, "Tension", which can be sampled here and whose lyrics I hope capture the spirit that pervades this very blog:  "I believe in cream puffs and apple pies/ I believe in nectarines and tangerines/ I believe in peace and love and understanding/ I believe in loving you eternally/ I believe in everything that you believe in/ but I also believe in tension/ I also believe in tension."

If you only have time to listen to one song, I encourage you to listen to the epic closer, "Tales of Endurance", because it is just incredible. Whatever the case, please enjoy this small slice of my musical world.

Playable playlist
http://grooveshark.com/playlist/For+Sarah+3/81911208

Original tracklist
https://www.dropbox.com/s/ycpxxix6vxllgkp/Sarah3playlist.xls